From U2 to Pink Floyd: the 10 most pretentious albums of all time
Why do we put artists on the pedestal they so often fall from? It’s simple. When a great musician like David Bowie creates something that speaks to us on an emotional level, they become a human iteration of our conscience, a person who can articulate our inner thoughts and project them to the world beautifully. As such, people worldwide begin to praise the person who can tap into their psyche and stunningly make sense of the mess.
However, fame is a dangerous thing. When you have stadiums full of people cheering what you are doing and fans all over the world constantly singing your praises and calling you a genius, it takes a big person not to let it go of their head. This often leads to the production of albums that are quite abstract and otherworldly in their execution but that an artist believes they should release because it’s an example of their genius. Rather than making music that people can connect with, they create something pretentious, with an attitude of, “Trust me, I’m the genius you all love; this is great”.
There are a lot of albums out there that come from the recess of a confused mind, gibberish masqueraded and only exposed when the rest of the world hear it. These albums always divide opinion, but for the most part, the only thing that can be said for the time they occupy is that it elapses. They’re not the listening experience that most people crave; instead, they experiment with the art form, which is certainly necessary but by no means entertaining.
Here, we will look at some of the most pretentious albums ever made, and discuss why their ambiguity falls flat.
The 10 most pretentious albums:
10. Zaireeka – The Flaming Lips
The Flaming Lips have always been a band keen on experimenting with their music, and their fans are always happy to engage with this. However, even the most devout lover of their music would attest that they took things a step too far with their eighth album, Zaireeka.
Released in 1997, the album consists of four separate discs, each representing a section of the record. Fans needed to play all four CDs at exactly the same time to hear the entire album. The band promised that people would hear a harmonic and juxtaposed sound, but many people didn’t bother trying to engage with it, given the awkward way they had to listen to it.
9. Songs of Innocence – U2
Imagine being so in your own head that you think the entire world would be grateful if you invaded their privacy and put your album on their phone without consent. That’s what U2 thought as they greenlit Apple putting their new album onto every iPhone, whether listeners wanted it or not. Songs of Innocence has nearly really had a proper review due to the controversial nature with which it was released, but the LP itself is nothing to write home about either.
Many musicians got their backs up about the release, saying that how the way the band conducted themselves undermined the craft of making music. Ozzy Osbourne said, “U2 did an album free, and it’s like, why would anybody do that? I don’t know… I liked some of their earlier stuff, but to be perfectly honest, that Bono pisses me off.”
8. Lulu – Lou Reed and Metallica
Lou Reed is another artist famous for being experimental with his music. Still, he took it too far when he collaborated with Metallica, the musical chalk to his cheese. Released in 2011, Lulu marked the last full-length recording project that Reed was involved in before his death, and unfortunately, it was one of the worst albums he ever made.
The record, though ambitious, was very tough to listen to. A concept album based on the Lulu plays by the German writer Frank Wedekind, Metallica’s heavily spoken-word album is one of the worst iterations of avant-garde. It was a polarising album, splitting the musical world into camps of love it or hate it, but overall, there is no denying the album is a pretentious attempt at a loose concept.
7. The Wall – Pink Floyd
When Pink Floyd initially formed, the goal was straightforward: be a successful band. When they released Dark Side of the Moon, they found that success, as David Gilmour and Roger Waters delved head first into their long-form concept album to create something that hadn’t been heard before. However, off the back of that concept album, Waters began to experiment even further with the music he made, which resulted in a divide between the band and some future albums that took themselves a bit too seriously.
One of these records was The Wall. Though many still consider the album a classic and some of the band’s best work, it also leaves behind a lot of what fans were previously able to connect with on Dark Side of the Moon. The end result comes across as quite pretentious, and the release of the album marked the beginning of the end of that Pink Floyd line-up.
6. The Car – Arctic Monkeys
From 2013 onwards, Arctic Monkeys seem to have made it their mission to become the most pretentious band on the planet. What started as a musical outfit loved by all because of their relatability and down-to-earth charm has now become four lost artists, simultaneously ahead of their time and well past it, so shrouded in pointless metaphor that they couldn’t appreciate a sunset unless it was quoting Chekhov.
While Tranquillity Base Hotel and Casino gave fans a glimpse into Arctic Monkeys’ loose grasp of how to put a concept album together, The Car was a masterclass in being a pretentious arsehole. With lyrics that run backwards around the world to get to a point a metre ahead and instrumentation so haphazard that it sounds like the first draft of an orchestral outtake, The Car remains one of the Sheffield band’s worst outings.
5. Once Upon a Time in Shaolin – Wu-Tang Clan
This is the most expensive piece of music ever made. Why? Wu-Tang Clan only created one copy and didn’t give people the option to download or stream it. Their seventh studio album, released in 2015, was sold to the highest bidder, who is bound by a legal agreement that says they cannot resell the album until the year 2103.
This sounds like the subplot in an absurd-style novel about the music industry, not the work of rap pioneers credited with being one of the greatest hip-hop outfits ever. The attitude surrounding the exclusivity of this album comes across more as performance art than the work of great musicians. All in all, it’s a pretentious record.
4. Psychodirect – Pete Townshend
Tell us how you really feel, Pete. Arguably, the king of the concept album went a little bit too meta on this poorly produced and far too close-to-home record. Psychodirect tells the story of a misunderstood 1960s rock star who is harassed by a music critic. The album plays poorly, didn’t sell well and is a concept that might have appealed to Townshend (who is evidently the subject of the piece) but not the public at large.
Granted, many people have pointed out that the album will be a satirical look at Townshend’s own life, and while this might be the case, it is impossible to hear the album and not feel that it is self-indulgent. The record remains the last piece of solo original work that the guitarist ever released, and if this is the direction he was going in, that can only be a good thing.
3. The Spaghetti Incident? – Guns N’ Roses
Though Guns N’ Roses‘ music often divides opinion because of touchy subject matters and the general attitude that surrounded some band members, there is no escaping the fact that they were ambitious artists. Following the release of Use Your Illusion I and II, the band cemented themselves as more than just a big-sounding rock group and instead showed their musical complexity and ability to master song structure.
Subsequently, when they released their fifth studio album, The Spaghetti Incident?, and left behind their originality for poorly executed covers from old punk rock and hard rock songs, it felt like a middle finger to fans. The pretentious nature of leaving behind what made you stand out and opting to play covers of other bands in a way that you dub supreme is an awful move by anyone’s standards.
2. STILL SUCKS – Limp Bizkit
There is no doubt that we are seeing a resurgence of Nu-Metal as Limp Bizkit continues to sell out massive arenas worldwide. The genre is starting to get recognition for how ahead of its time it was in terms of blatantly merging genres. That being said, no amount of momentum can stop the fact that their most recent album was one of the worst things the band ever put out.
Equally, the band’s attitude on their new album comes across as condescending and pretentious. Calling it STILL SUCKS might initially come across as a cute nod at the negative criticism they have received in the past, but it actually foreshadows an LP that the band put no effort into. The humour subsequently comes across as pretentious over anything else, as if the band are saying, “We knew you’d hate this, how smart are we?”
1. Tales from Topographic Oceans – Yes
This could be a controversial one. Yes is a band whose career can be split into various iterations. What initially started as a prog rock band steadily started chasing hits following the success of their single ‘Owner of a Lonely Heart’. This means that many of their albums divide opinions among fans who prefer different eras.
During one of their most ambitious periods, Yes released Tales from Topographic Oceans. The album is over two hours long and consists of six songs. While some fans of the band enjoy the journey that the album takes listeners on, others believe the record is pretentious, with many mundane periods and no real payoff for the amount of time that goes into listening.
