It’s on the meter: the taxi ride that circumnavigated the globe
You know those evenings when you’re huddled at a corner table in a sticky pub, thinking about ridiculous activities to do with your mates over a couple of too many pints of Guinness? Then, as the lights come back on and you’re waddling back home, you slowly come back to your senses and realise how nutty and senseless your conversation was. Well, that was not the case for Paul Archer, Johno Ellison, and Leigh Purnell, three English friends in their 20s, who actually carried out their preposterous pub plan in 2011.
Things took a turn for the trio, pun very much intended: “We’re now sitting here on the brink of an eight-month expedition wondering what we have got ourselves into,” said Archer in 2008, with a hint of regret mingled with forced conviction.
The mission: To complete the longest-ever journey around the world on a British black cab. The idea was conceived while complaining about how taxi drivers always choose the longest route to take you to your destination, which we all know to be unfortunately true. The men set a goal to raise around £20,000 for the British Red Cross, perhaps to give a valid reason for this absolutely bonkers idea.
Not long after, a 1992 Austin FX4 black cab was added to the eBay cart for a meagre sum of £1,500 – a proper bargain, I’d say. She was baptised – I say ‘she’ because Hannah, the taxi, had a whole identity of her own – named after the song ‘Hard Hearted Hannah’, which tells of a woman who hates men and loves to see them suffer. This was certainly a foreshadowing of the perilous journey ahead with a vehicle that couldn’t even stand on its own four wheels. Indeed, the taxi’s only saving grace was its Nissan 2.7 litre Turbo Diesel engine, the only part that did not break. The expeditioners concluded this was because it was made in Japan and not in England, where nothing works, not even the human brain, clearly.
The expedition officially began on a bitter February morning in 2011 at the London Transport Museum, where the men completed the journey a year later in May. Amongst the supporters was former Prime Minister Boris Johnson, who was London mayor at the time. He was ecstatic about this insane idea, the first of many in his ever-growing catalogue of absurdity.
Off they went, down to Dover, then crossing most of western Europe, then up to the Arctic Circle, where through frosted windows and under layers of blankets, they saw the Northern Lights. Things got a bit heated in Russia when the équipe was arrested in Moscow. Thankfully, their stay behind bars was short-lived, and they got down to Italy in a jiffy. Then Croatia, Bosnia, Montenegro, Kosovo, Macedonia, Greece, Georgia, Armenia, Turkey, and Iraq. But they hit another bump in the road when the team were in Iran and were questioned by secret police for mistakenly camping next to an artillery installation.
Fast-forward nine months into the journey. After having travelled across 41 countries, three continents, and ten different time zones, the expedition arrived in sunny Sydney just in time for Christmas.
Just like that, it was now time to make the journey back home, this time taking the back route through America. At this point, poor old Hannah, who had been alone on her journey, was joined by a companion, the American yellow taxi Skinny Margarita, who accompanied her to New York City.
Upon their arrival in May 2012, over a year after their departure, the team was able to beat the last world record by more than double, a whopping 43,208.4 miles with a taxi fare of just over £79,006.80. So, next time you’re in a black cab thinking about how you’re about to go through daylight robbery, think about Hannah and thank your lucky stars.
