“I took it like a man”: the night Gene Simmons vowed to make Adam Sandler his bitch
Even though most of his movies are shite, regardless of whether he’s acting in them or only producing, the consensus is that Adam Sandler is one of the nicest guys and best bosses in Hollywood.
Almost anyone who’s worked with the star, comedian, and producer has nothing but the nicest things to say about him, and any performer or filmmaker who makes a good impression on the ‘Sandman’ tends to have a job for life, looking at how many frequent collaborators he’s racked up over the years.
Sandler also has a habit of incorporating musicians into his filmography, with everyone from Ozzy Osbourne and Eminem to Dave Matthews and Post Malone, all of whom have made cameo appearances in a Happy Madison flick. However, Gene Simmons is not one of them, and he might never be.
Why? Because the Kiss frontman made a solemn vow that, come hell or high water, he’d make Sandler his bitch. As one does, he came to that conclusion at a Christmas party the Golden Globe nominee was hosting, which was obviously the best time to try and make good on what’s a creepily ominous threat.
Sandler asked Simmons if he’d be interested in performing a couple of songs, and he was happy to oblige, but only if there was a queasy quid pro quo. “Adam’s in there because he’s a real rock fan, jumping up and down, and somebody was taking a photo of us,” the frontman recalled.
“I wanted to turn Adam into my bitch, so I stuck my tongue almost down his throat,” he added, which is weird, to put it lightly. Ever the good sport, as much as Netflix’s golden goose was understandably freaked out by the situation, he took it in his stride, which is admirable, when he’d have every reason to freak the fuck out.
“The tongue comes out, the seven-incher,” Sandler recalled. “He starts coming at the ‘Sandman’ with the tongue, and I’m like, playing along, and then I’m like, ‘Oh man, he’s getting real close’. Came at the ‘Sandman’, big tongue right to me. I think he gave me a couple of licks. I took it like a man.”
Simmons’ career has not been without controversy, and trying to force your tongue down someone’s throat in an attempt to make them your bitch is a questionable practice, even if he was operating under the impression that it was funny, and the guy on the receiving end happened to be Adam Sandler.
It can’t have been a fun moment for the actor to realise that the Kiss crooner had an agenda when he agreed to take to the stage alongside him, but at least he managed to emerge relatively unscathed.
