Bleachers – ‘Everyone for Ten Minutes’ album review: A chore of a record too afraid to shake off trite indie-pop formulas
New Jersey indie-rousers Bleachers are back with Everyone for Ten Minutes, another earnest splurge of anthemic folksy-pop fodder which never nabs the electric confessionals they’re desperately clamouring for.
The Skinny: He’s certainly trying. Frontman and creative force Jack Antonoff has been steering the Bleachers ensemble for over ten years now, cooking a disparate brew of sonic stylings that attempt to whisk smooth synth washes, soulful cheer, a touch of rustic roots stomp, and a clear embrace of Bruce Springsteen’s heartland theatre that Antonoff is an evident fan of. It’s a formula that’s served Bleachers very well, winning a dedicated fanbase from their fist-pumping, cathartic sermons of emotional outpouring at live shows.
Challenging a cruel and callous world, “daring us not to give a fuck” is noble enough, but never at any point in Everyone for Ten Minutes does the spirit feel sincerely moved or profundity gleaned.
Perhaps it’s the watery hodgepodge of a soundtrack. Rather than exploring a rich breadth of musical flavours, the mush of electronic coating, stomp-clap chants, and indie rock blasts neuter each other into a dirge of tepid sog that fails to trigger the faintest pulse.
Such a safe dwelling makes for a chore of a listen. When shifting aside such limited musical scope, we rely heavily on Antonoff’s leading prowess for much strenuous lifting, but his presence is all just too terribly well-mannered in tandem with the tame score behind him.
Whether it’s ‘Dirty Wedding Dress’ Boss pastiche, ‘She’s From Before’s meandering country twang, or the thin and insipid cruise of ‘Upstairs at Els’, which forgot to add anything of interest outside its nostalgic reminisce, the Bleachers team know how to corral a big song and dance but leave the listener feeling completely empty.
There’s no doubt long-time fans will eagerly cling to Everyone for Ten Minutes as a cherished return for Antonoff’s life-affirming indie songbook, but most of us will be left utterly nonplussed by its anaemic bluster.
Standout Track: ‘The Van’
The Verdict: For its high-powered front and seeming emotional charge, Everyone for Ten Minutes sees Bleachers dwell in a thin score that never strays anywhere intrepid, and is nagged by a hollow, barren lack of guts that never soars into the soaring valleys for which frontman Jack Antonoff’s flapping his arms toward.
Release Date: May 22nd, 2026 | Producer: Jack Antonoff | Label: Bleachers Band Recordings
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