The Woody Allen movie Stephen King believe committed the worst cinematic crime: “I’ve been had”
When Stephen King emerged in the 1970s, he quickly established himself as one of the most important writers of his time. His debut novel, Carrie, was transformed into a film by Brian De Palma to great success in 1975, proving that his material was ripe for big-screen adaptations. Since then, over 55 movies and television shows have been made using King’s work as their source, helping to establish him as the ‘King of Horror’.
With all those movie adaptations associated with his name, King has come to know a thing or two about cinema. He might not have found much success with his own attempt at directing, 1986’s Maximum Overdrive, but the writer is still very opinionated when it comes to films, and he often finds the time to share his views on certain pictures he has enjoyed – and those he has hated.
Writing for an issue of Film Comment in 1981, King revealed his opinions on a certain Woody Allen movie that he detested, revealing that it committed the cardinal sin of cinema. It was “boring.” It wouldn’t be unfair to say that many people would perhaps prefer to watch an entertainingly bad film rather than one that just leaves you thinking about other things; at least when you watch something so bad it’s good, you come away feeling as though you’ve not completely wasted your time.
King hated Allen’s 1980 project Stardust Memories, which was inspired by Federico Fellini’s classic Italian masterwork 8½. Alongside Allen, the film also starred Charlotte Rampling and Suspiria star Jessica Harper, and followed Allen’s character, a comedian, as he tries to be taken seriously for his art, with people rejecting his attempts to move towards a more refined style.
Allen claimed it wasn’t autobiographical, but many viewers weren’t buying it. King was mainly bothered about how much the film seemed to drag, writing, “A bad movie is not the worst offence against Constant Filmgoer; a boring one is. When, as in Woody Allen’s Stardust Memories, I find myself putting off getting a drink of water in the lobby so I will have something to look forward to, I know that I’ve been had.”
Critics were similarly disappointed with the movie, which failed to reach the heights of previous Allen pictures, like the acclaimed 1977 romantic comedy Annie Hall. Legendary critic Roger Ebert didn’t seem as bored as King was, but he certainly wasn’t won over by the movie. “Stardust Memories inspires that kind of frustration, though, because it’s the first Woody Allen film in which impotence has become the situation rather than the problem. This is a movie about a guy who has given up,” he wrote, calling it a “disappointment” in need of “some larger idea”.
Allen has always been a controversial figure, not just because of his personal life, but because of his self-deprecating and neurotic sensibilities, which are often reflected in the characters he plays. Unsurprisingly, Allen’s character in Stardust Memories is incredibly neurotic, a flawed character that many viewers found hard to put up with. Clearly, King was not interested in watching Allen act like this in yet another film, instead waiting for the moment he could exit the movie theatre.
