The wild moment Grace Jones was offered “a baby” as payment for a show
As a fashion and sonic icon who has influenced everyone from Annie Lennox to Issey Miyake, it’s only fair that Grace Jones has some pretty high standards.
Whether it’s in music, clothes, or anything else, Jones may be lumped with somewhat of a diva persona, but it’s not without valid reason: she has images to uphold and a status to keep. She’s done it for decades at this point, after all; why shouldn’t people just fall at her feet? Of course, it should go without saying that a limit does exist within this, even for the woman herself, because money and plaudits are well and good, but would you want to be paid through the gift of motherhood?
While this may sound like an extreme exaggeration, it actually is within the bounds of truth in the stories inside Jones’s locker. Because, yes: although she ultimately declined the offer, the singer was genuinely once offered a baby as payment for a gig, as if a financial fee could ever be an appropriate exchange for the life of a child. It’s the utmost example of rock and roll truly running wild.
The whole issue revolved around Jones’s stubborn policy that she refuses to perform until she gets paid first. You can argue amongst yourselves on whether you believe this to be the right approach or not, but the fact of the matter is that this is the rule she sticks to, and always has done. That’s something which LG – the electronics company – learned the hard way when they hired her to perform at a corporate gig in London, but made the rookie error of not coughing up the cash first.
Jones recounted this fateful tale in her memoir, explaining: “I am ready for action. The champagne is flowing, the oysters slipping down nicely. Again, though, no money, and it is a Saturday. They are begging me. ‘We will have the money on Monday.’ No, I am not moving until I am paid. I won’t even leave the hotel and go to the venue, because there is too much pressure once you arrive.” After bartering with the company that she could hold their jewellery and watches until the payment arrived, they unsurprisingly said no, but then got “desperate”.
“‘We have an employee who has a baby she is prepared to offer as security’,” Jones incredulously recalled them saying. “‘We have a baby! You can keep the baby until we bring you the money.’” Exactly how they ever thought she was going to be prepared to do this was anyone’s guess, but the singer nevertheless confirmed, almost without having to, that “I didn’t take the baby. They couldn’t get the money. I didn’t do the show.”
That decisively put the entire bizarre affair, thankfully, to bed – with Jones’s principals, the LG employees’ jewellery, and most importantly, the baby, intact. Just imagine if she had taken the child and the company hadn’t produced the cash, though: celebrity adoptions can be strange at the best of times, but might Jones have stolen the crown for one of the weirdest?
