“Childish”: The Eric Clapton song that was too angry to release
Every good musician knows how to channel their emotions whenever they write a song. It would be easy for anyone to throw together any old piece of gibberish and pretend to sound genuine whenever they play, but the best tunes are about documenting how someone feels in the moment and then having something to show for it once they strap on their guitar. There were limits on where things could go in rock and roll, and Eric Clapton figured that a handful of his songs may have been a bit too aggressive for the mainstream.
But Clapton is someone who normally left all of his emotion onstage whenever he played. Looking at some of his performances throughout his prime, he was always trying to make the best out of whatever song he was working with, usually flying off the handle and turning all of his pain into the tastiest blues licks the world had ever heard.
It’s not like he was too scared to show his bleeding heart in song, either. The whole point behind putting together Derek and the Dominoes was to create a disguise to show Patti Boyd his love, and when he started writing tunes like ‘Layla’ and ‘Bell Bottom Blues,’ it was hard not to hear his pain throughout every lick that he played.
Then again, it’s one thing to talk about romantic love and another to delve into grief. The whole point behind all blues is about trying to recover from whatever weight the world has put on you, but anyone who has ever dealt with the loss of one of their children is going to need more than a song to shrug everything off and move on. After Clapton lost his Connor in a freak accident, a record like Pilgrim was the only way he knew how to deal with his state of mind.
However, this is not a record all about making multiple different versions of ‘Tears in Heaven,’ either. Clapton had written his masterpiece for his son already, so a lot of these tunes are about him exploring his relationships with other parts of his family, and anyone who has ever dealt with a lack of closure between the family members can relate to ‘My Father’s Eyes.’
“For instance, the first draft of ‘My Father’s Eyes’ came out sounding pretty petulant. The lyrics were too angry and childish.”
eric clapton
While Clapton intended the tune to be an exploration of his relationship with his father through the loss of his son, he said that his original version was too vicious for anyone to hear, saying, “For instance, the first draft of ‘My Father’s Eyes’ came out sounding pretty petulant. The lyrics were too angry and childish. Where the art and craft came in was in being able to shape the anger into something people could empathize with. It wouldn’t work for me to just kind of sulk in the song, because it wouldn’t have communicated.”
Compared to the rudimentary tunes that Clapton wrote back in the day, it’s important to realise how big a step it was trying to rewrite a tune like this. Most people only get to etch their feelings in stone like this once, and since ‘Slowhand’ had been listening to singer-songwriters like The Band for some time, he knew that he needed to go the extra mile if wanted people to see the truth behind what he was saying.
Because while anyone could write a song about getting hurt and having no kind of outlet for their rage or heartache, it’s important to show some depth in there as well. And when listening to ‘My Father’s Eyes,’ you’re not hearing Clapton trying to juggle his emotions. This is the voice of the kid who never had a real father figure and who is desperately trying to find some peace in his later years.
