Sharing extracts from her memoir, Mean Baby, Selma Blair has opened up about being a victim of rape and sexual assault. The excerpts were published in People Magazine and also deal with The Cruel Intentions actor’s problems with alcoholism. In one of the passages, Blair discusses how she was raped after a day of binge drinking.
In the book, Blair writes: “I don’t know if both of them raped me. One of them definitely did. I wish I could say what happened to me that night was an anomaly, but it wasn’t. I have been raped, multiple times, because I was too drunk to say the words ‘Please. Stop.’ Only that one time was violent. I came out of each event quiet and ashamed.”
Blair explained to People Magazine that she hasn’t shared these experiences with anyone, not even her therapist. However, she believes that writing about them has helped her heal. “I had so much shame and blame,” she continued. “I’m grateful I felt safe enough to put it on the page. And then can work on it with a therapist and with other writing, and really relieve that burden of shame on myself.”
In Mean Baby, Blair also details an incident in which she was sexually assaulted by a teacher at a school she attended as a teenager. According to the actor, he was a close friend, confidant and “the greatest man” she’d ever met. Blair claims he sexually assaulted her in his office when she went to say goodbye before the winter break. “I trusted authority,” she writes. “I was just a teenager.”
Recalling the assault in more detail, Blair said: “We embraced. It felt too long and too still and too quiet.” She explains that he then put his hand inside her underwear. “He didn’t rape me,” she writes. “He didn’t threaten me. But he broke me. Nothing ever happened again, but I never felt safe.”
The book also explores Blair’s alcoholism and her struggle with Multiple Sclerosis. The actor has been sober since 2016 but began drinking at the age of seven. Describing getting drunk for the first time at Passover, Blair writes: “As I took small sips of the Manischewitz I was allowed throughout the seder a light flooded through me, filling me up with the warmth of God. But the year I was seven, when we basically had Manischewitz on tap and no one was paying attention to my consumption level, I put it together: the feeling was not God but fermentation.” Mean Baby is slated for release on May 17th.