‘I Hate Myself For Loving You’: how Joan Jett proved she didn’t give a damn in one song
Why has rock ‘n’ roll lasted as long as it has? While it may not be the most popular genre in the world anymore, rock bands can still sell out arenas on a moment’s notice, and the ideology of the rock star continues to live on in musicians across all genres. But what is it about this sound that we find so infectious? What about the likes of Joan Jett, Alice Cooper and Led Zeppelin are we so drawn to?
To answer the question, let’s take a look at why people like music in general. It’s a lot of fun to listen to, listening to music is something we do quite naturally, and it’s an art form that we find incredibly easy to connect with. When people write songs about love, hate, and all things in between, they are vocalising internal thoughts that we all share, but doing so in a way that sounds beautiful, and we’re happy to engage with. As such, music is not just an art form, but is an extension of ourselves.
Looking at rock music specifically, all of the above still applies, but it brings with it a great deal of attitude. While you continue to feel this connection with the artist you are listening to, you can also rejoice in the fact that the music you listen to is inherently badass. It’s both realist and escapist in that sense, which is something very few pieces of work can achieve.
One artist who completely epitomises this idea is Joan Jett. She is one of the greatest and most dynamic vocalists in rock, but she retains that edge with everything she sings. It means that regardless of whether she is singing about rock ‘n’ roll or love, she does so in a way which is infectious. Her voice sounds effortlessly suave, and it gives her an “I don’t give a damn” sound that continues to resonate today.
There are a number of great Joan Jett songs that champion this style, but one of the most definitive is her 1988 hit ‘I Hate Myself For Loving You’. The song’s theme is incredibly vulnerable, as it revolves around falling for the wrong person and not being able to shake the feeling. However, despite this meaning, Jett delivers the song in a way which is true to her leather-clad rock ‘n’ roll style. If you ever want to stop giving a damn about someone who doesn’t treat you right, this is the song to do it to.
There are other reasons as to why this song embodies Jett’s not giving a damn attitude, though. The first is the means by which the co-writing credit for the track was achieved. The band were keen on working with Desmond Child, but he was busy with other artists at the time. Not caring about his apparent schedule, Joan Hett and Kenny Laguna persistently campaigned to get Child on board.
“There was a friend of ours at Epic Records who was friends with Desmond, and before the Bon Jovi record came out, he played me the song ‘Livin On A Prayer’. I said, ‘Whoa, I want to meet this guy,’ so I started chasing Desmond around,” recalled Jett’s bandmate Kenny Laguna. “He didn’t want any part of it because he was busy looking for really important acts like Michael Bolton. I just chased him around until he couldn’t take it anymore. There was something about his style I liked, it reminded me of The Four Seasons. Sure enough, he had worked with Bob Crewe.”
Another iconic reason that this song represents Jett’s badass nature is Steve Tyler’s reaction to the track. One of rock music’s biggest parodies turned up at Jett’s door one night in a bid to win her over. His means of doing so involved stripping completely naked, knocking on her hotel room door and saying, “I hate myself for loving you.” Taking one look at Tyler, Jett embodied the not giving a damn nature of her song, and promptly closed the door.
