The iconic author who loathed “fat bastard” Alfred Hitchcock: “Why on earth did you bother?”
Even though his credentials as one of cinema’s most influential and innovative auteurs are about as ironclad as it gets, Alfred Hitchcock made more than a few enemies during a long, distinguished, and illustrious career that cemented his name in Hollywood history.
Not all of them came from inside the industry, either, although there were a few of those, too. Tippi Hedren was the most famous, or infamous, after she went public with her grievances against the ‘Master of Suspense’, who she accused of ruining her promising career out of nothing but pure spite.
Michael Caine refused to work with him in Frenzy, a rejection Hitchcock took so badly that he never spoke to the two-time Academy Award winner again, while he constantly butted heads with Paul Newman during the production of Torn Curtain, with the legendary star’s methodical approach to performance not sitting too well with a filmmaker who was used to ordering his performers around like, as he put it, cattle.
Of course, you can’t make so many seminal cinematic omelettes without breaking a few eggs, and the director never lost any sleep over irritating his cast, crew, or the occasional producer with his demanding ways. However, he made a serious enemy in the form of Raymond Chandler, a titan of American literature.
One of the key figures in noir, his works have proven so popular that they’re still being adapted to this day, almost 70 years after his death. Even if his novels aren’t being translated from page to screen, his fingerprints have been clear in countless movies that have been helmed by everyone from the Coen brothers to Shane Black.
When he teamed up with Hitchcock to pen the screenplay for 1951’s Strangers on a Train, it seemed a match made in heaven. After all, the director was synonymous with the high-concept thriller, Patricia Highsmith’s novel was hugely popular, and Chandler was tailor-made to script a story full of mystery and intrigue.
Unfortunately, the author hated every minute of the experience, going so far as to denigrate the ‘Master of Suspense’ as a “fat bastard.” Accurate, sure, but harsh. Eventually, the two parted ways, and while Chandler retained a co-writing credit, most of the script was rewritten by Czenzi Ormonde. In response, the Philip Marlowe creator penned a scathing letter in Hitchcock’s direction, ripping him to shreds.
“Regardless of whether or not my name appears on the screen among the credits, I’m not afraid that anybody will think I wrote this stuff,” he mused. “They’ll know damn well I didn’t. I shouldn’t have minded in the least if you had produced a better script, believe me. I shouldn’t. But if you wanted something written in skim milk, why on earth did you bother to come to me in the first place?”
Needless to say, Chandler wasn’t enthused when he saw Strangers on a Train, but if there was one sliver of a silver lining, it was that he was convinced the shooting script was so terrible that not a single soul familiar with his writing would think he had anything to do with it, even though it carried his name.
