The 10 best Christmas movies for people who hate Christmas
Christmas can be exhausting; all the expected cheer and socialising, the mince pies and tradition, the tinsel and tatt. Even the music and films can leave you totally sick of the holiday as the same tired classics are played on a loop.
Only so many times can a person stomach watching The Grinch or It’s A Wonderful Life. Unless you have Buddy the Elf levels of festive cheer, classic Christmas films are often too cheesy to handle. Never super engaging or stimulating for film fans, the Christmas movie genre is one suffocatingly packed with clichés and eye-rolling happy endings.
But being uninterested in the tired old traditional movies shouldn’t mean a total alienation from the festivities. There are ways to get in the spirit without ever having to come close to pressing play on Santa Clause 2. There are plenty of Christmassy – or Christmas-adjacent movies – that are genuinely good for festive haters.
The marker of what qualifies as a Christmas is loose. Somehow, movies like Die Hard and Batman have ended up being written into the canon of alternative holiday movies. It seems that having only one or two Christmassy hints or a slightly snowy scene is enough to pass the test. That descriptor is good enough for us when it comes to finding films that are more than watchable this festive period.
10 alternative Christmas movies:
Black Christmas (Bob Clark, 1974)
For those that seriously can’t stomach a single drop of festive jobs, welcome to the world of the Christmas horror movie. In 1974, this Canadian Christmas slasher movie shocked the world. As the original festive thriller, Black Christmas is inspired by a real-life murder spree that occurred in Montreal. Following a group of sorority girls who receive threatening phone calls before things get even darker, no one could possibly say this is too cheery.
Set during the Christmas season, festivities play no real role here other than popping some Christmas trees in the background of some brutal, gore-filled scenes. Despite being a bit aged, Black Christmas is still genuinely scary, full of jumps and frights that will shake off the festive slump.
Boogie Nights (Paul Thomas Anderson, 1997)
The Paul Thomas Anderson film is more of an XXXmas film than a Christmas classic. Starring Mark Wahlberg, Julianne Moore, John C. Reilly and Heather Graham, the film follows a young nightclub dishwasher as he dives into the late 1970s porn industry. It’s not quite a family-friendly contender, but still, Boogie Nights is a great option for people completely exhausted of festive cheer.
There are enough Christmas details to quality. Sure, someone is murdered at their Christmas party, and the Dunkin Donuts scene might just feature a little bit of tinsel, but that’s more than enough cheer for this year. Either way, Boogie Nights is one of Anderson’s best flicks to keep viewers entertained during the post-turkey slump.
Bridget Jones’s Diary (Sharon Maguire, 2001)
Even the biggest scrooges need a little dose of festive cheese. The iconic Bridget Jones’s Diary is a perfect contender for a subtly festive, feel-good movie. Opening at a family Christmas party and closing with a dramatic, snow-flurrying finale, there are just enough festivities to qualify.
Still genuinely funny despite being so evidently born out of the 2000s, Renée Zellweger’s portrayal of the ultimate frazzled British woman trying to figure her life out is infectious. There’s a reason why the Bridget Jones films are such a timeless series: they deliver plenty of laugh-out-loud moments and a much-needed dose of relatability during a season of overblown happiness and social media perfection.
Carol (Todd Haynes, 2015)
Carol sits high on the list of film fan’s favourite Christmas movies. Based on a 1952 novel called The Price Of Salt by Patricia Highsmith, the story follows two women navigating a sapphic romance in 1950s New York. An early and pioneering novel about homosexuality, Carol as a movie, has become just as much of a cult classic.
With actually very little to do with Christmas, it will make holiday haters very happy. Opening with the infamous glove scene as the main character Therese meets Carol while working in a Christmas department store, that’s about the extent of the festive connection. But what it lacks in tinsel, it makes up for in emotion.
Die Hard (John McTiernan, 1988)
When 20th Century Fox released Die Hard, an action film about a terrorist attack, in February, they probably didn’t think it would somehow become a Christmas classic. Yes, the film has become essential viewing for the festive period, reigning as the ultimate non-Christmassy Christmas film.
There is absolutely nothing about Die Hard that would make a Christmas hater squirm. The high-octane action film is exactly that, with Bruce Willis and Alan Rickman putting in gripping performances. The only reason the film has ended up attached to the holiday is that Die Hard is set on Christmas Eve, as a festive New York is rocked by a terrorist siege.
Edward Scissorhands (Tim Burton, 1990)
Tim Burton’s 1990 gothic romance, Edward Scissorhands, is another weird one that’s somehow ended up being considered a Christmas film. Starring Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder in two career-defining performances, the film follows the unlikely romance between Kim and Edward, a man with scissors for hands.
In the film’s final third, the theme of Christmas does creep in as the town has its annual Christmas party. The scene where Edward trims and shapes a Christmas tree with his hands is enough to make the movie quality. But with all the weirdness and quirks of all Burton’s movies, this one never gets tired or too cheery.
Eyes Wide Shut (Stanley Kubrick, 1999)
Ah, yes. That classic Stanley Kubrick Christmas film. The psychological drama Eyes Wide Shut is probably the world’s most unlikely contender for a Christmas movie, but it works. As the final film that Kubrick ever directed, it feels like he decided to get out all his wild and perverse ideas with this controversial, erotic drama. Starring Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise, Kubrick considered the movie his “greatest contribution to the art of cinema”.
Based on the 1926 novella Traumnovelle, or Dream Story, by Arthur Schnitzler, the original tale is set at Mardi Gras in Vienna. However, Kubrick changed the setting to New York City at Christmas time, in turn writing it into the cinema lovers’ Christmas canon.
Krampus (Michael Dougherty, 2015)
Following in the footsteps of Black Christmas, Krampus sits in the lineage of festive frights. As a slightly more family-friendly pick, this one is a comedy horror that is more silly than genuinely scary. But it’s still left field enough to add a bit of excitement back into Christmas viewing.
Based on the figure from European folklore, Krampus is to Santa what the devil is to an angel. In the original folk tales, Krampus would visit the misbehaving children who didn’t get any presents to scare them into submission. Now appropriated for American movies, Krampus the film is a tale of a family trying to band together while the mythological creature terrorises their neighbourhood.
Little Women (Greta Gerwig, 2019)
Greta Gerwig’s take on the classic novel Little Women is a genuine pleasure to watch all year round. Starring Saoirse Ronan, Florence Pugh, Timothée Chalamet, Meryl Streep and more, the all-star cast does a stellar job of acting out the heartwarming yet devastating tale of four sisters. It’s the sort of time that the whole family will love, with enough gripping emotion to keep cinephiles happy and enough plot to keep Grandma entertained.
It also has more than enough wintery scenes to qualify as a Christmas film. Following the family through the years of their lives, we see several Christmases in the movie as the sisters grow and change. All in all, Little Women is just a lovely film that delivers the necessary Christmas wholesome energy without any cringe or cliché.
When Harry Met Sally (Rob Reiner, 1989)
They go Christmas tree shopping, sleigh bells play at one point, and there is a snowy scene; that’s more than enough to allow When Harry Met Sally to qualify for Christmas movie status. Really more of a New Year’s Eve movie, this Nora Ephron classic is a will-they-won’t-they tale for the ages. Starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal, this timeless rom-com never gets old, thanks to the endless charm of the two leads.
Surely, no one in the world hates this movie. It’s funny, sentimental and genuinely sweet, making it the perfect holiday viewing that mums will especially love. Or better yet, save it for New Year’s Eve and hit play at exactly 10:30pm, allowing the finale NYE kiss to perfectly sync up with midnight ringing in 2024.
