Here at Far Out Magazine we really like to report the cutting edge of alternative music, get down to the bones of a story, bring the people what they want.

So, with that in mind, we transport ourselves back to 2010, to a time when innocent indie rock and roll bands came under ferocious, unprovoked and uncontrollable attack.

King of Leon, a band at the height of their fame, with thousands of middle-aged mothers screaming from their burning loins that their ‘Sex is on Fire’, become the major victims of the aforementioned attacks on indie icons.

Not afraid of what was about to come, Kings of Leon and their support acts The Postelles and The Stills, headed to St Louis, Missouri with strength in numbers. No, they will not succumb to these unprovoked attacks, they will bring their music to their adoring fans and… and… THEY WILL defeat those pesky pigeons once and for all!

First up to brave the inevitable onslaught, sent out like sacrificed lambs, The Postelles. After a set riddled with direct hits, they returned backstage splattered, wounded, covered in the shit of those pesky pigeons who hovered menacingly above the stage. They made it through… barely.

Second up, The Stills, with fear of what had just happened to their colleagues running through their veins like the shit that covered The Postelles. Perhaps hoping that those fearsome pigeons are beginning to run out of ammo, their hopes were dashed immediately and they returned to their dressing rooms looking like a decorator’s radio.

Now though, now it was time for the big event, the headline act, The Kings of Leon. With the warning words of the two previous bands ringing in their ears, in what first seemed like a joke, was now a terrifying reality. This is it lads, time to get out of the trenches and head to the frontline armed with nothing but some musical instruments. Carnage was impending.

Surely, SURELY after bombarding two bands prior to this moment the pigeons will be running low on ammunition. The band, at this point, just hoping to get through the early onslaught, desperately wanting to battle through. What they didn’t realise, though, is that this gang of pigeons were saving up their top marksman for this moment. Their striker, the sniper, the deadly weapon… and he meant business.

Two songs in and the Kings of Leon are in no shape to continue. Their the walking wounded, they’ve been descimated and it is the bass player, of all people, that has taken the major hits.

Enough is enough, it’s over. The Tennessee rockers have tried valiantly but this is the end, it can’t go on. If this was a boxing match the towel would have been thrown as soon as the drumbeat to ‘Taper Jean Girl’ kicked in, this band are just too damn brave for their own good.

The band finished the song, the drummer alerted security and a couple of the heavily wounded lads wiped their faces with a towel and got the fuck out of there.

Writing on Twitter at the time of the massacre, drummer Nathan Followill explained: “So sorry St Louis. We had to bail, pigeons shitting in Jared‘s mouth and it was too unsanitary to continue.

“Don’t take it out on Jared, it’s the fucking venue’s fault. You may enjoy being shit on but we don’t. Sorry for all who travelled many miles,” he added.

As if this was happenin now, after all they have been through, the band couldn’t believe it. After braving a shitstorm on stage the poor bastards are battling one off the stage as well… you just couldn’t write this kind of scenario.

“The Kings Of Leon decided to carry on regardless,” the group added in a statement released later. “The band felt it would be unfair to the fans to cancel the show at that late moment.”

“We couldn’t believe what The Postelles and The Stills looked like after their sets. We didn’t want to cancel the show, so we went for it. We tried to play. It was ridiculous.”

Apparently, the venue managers told the band’s representatives prior to the show about “a significant pigeon infestation problem with summer shows over the years, but they were doing all they could to fix it” but the band couldn’t back down, they thought they could take the pigeons. Oh, how wrong they were.

Jared Followill, the bass player who suffered most that night, said: “I was hit by pigeons on each of the first three songs. We had 20 songs on the set list. By the end of the show, I would have been covered from head to toe.”

“The last thing I was going to do was look up … but if that was only a couple, we must have caught them right after a big Thanksgiving dinner,” he quipped.

Hearing about the nightmare, Followill’s worried mother called him to check on his welfare. “I was attacked, Mom, but not by humans,” Followill said he told her.

Blimey, what a rollercoaster. A fan managed to capture some of the action but, given the amount of shit they were being hit with, the footage is a little difficult to follow.


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