The performance Michael Caine thought would get him fired: “I was very bad”
Michael Caine‘s position as one of Britain’s finest actors began in the theatres of London. Despite now boasting an impressive resume, capable of dwarfing most of the greatest Hollywood actors, with credits that include the Batman trilogy, Alfie and Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, as well as the ultimate star turn in A Muppet’s Christmas Carol, Caine’s climb may have been a long but, following his retirement announcement, he’s leaving the industry as one of its giants.
However, looking up at the career ladder ahead of him, Caine almost put his foot through the first rung as his first major motion picture, Zulu from 1964, almost saw Caine fired from set — an action that could have easily derailed his illustrious career. The film is certainly the start of the actor’s impressive journey, but it could have ended if one director had chosen to follow the advice given to him.
Things were a little difficult from the start. Caine’s working-class accent meant he auditioned for the cockney charmer James Booth. However, his tone would have to be curtailed for his role, as director Cy Enfield felt Caine held himself like an officer and cast him as Lieutenant Gonville Bromhead. The role would start Caine’s career on the silver screen and send his star rising immediately.
“The stakes were high; this was my big break,” reflected Caine in his autobiography. The movie might have been his moment to truly transcend the stage and have his name up in lights, but as he sat down for a screening, dread began to set in: “The projectors whirred, the screen flickered and suddenly a huge face appeared and began to drone on in a ridiculously clipped British accent.”
“I broke out in a sweat, my heart pounding,” noted the actor. Things had not gone well in his eyes. “I wasn’t just bad – I was very bad. Career over, I thought.” Being surrounded by an audience didn’t help either: “‘Who told that silly b*****d to pull his hat down over his f***ing eyes?’ I heard someone say just behind me.”
But Caine had felt that his performance had something to it that they had missed. It might not have felt like a success, but the role was certainly given some thought, “I was outraged – this was a skilful piece of characterisation! I had worn a pith helmet that shaded the top half of my face and I would tip my head back to allow the sun to catch my eyes when I wanted to make a particular point.”
But that unique piece of character profiling hadn’t been enough to save him, “I’d be on the first plane home. The next evening, determined to face the music like a man, I went to the bar in the hotel we all stayed in, lined up a couple of drinks and waited for (co-star and producer) Stanley and (director) Cy to come in from the day’s shooting.”
But while Caine was ready to hand in his notice and make his way back to England, things took an unexpected turn. “‘Hey – not bad, kid!’ Stanley said as they breezed by. ‘Don’t worry – you’ll get better.’ I stood looking after them, mouth open. Did they really mean it? I downed the drinks and decided I needed to work on my paranoia.”
While some imposter’s syndrome had likely crept into Caine’s thinking, he wasn’t totally out of line. It was later revealed that a Paramount executive wanted him fired, something the actor learned by reading the producer’s mail. “Fire Michael Caine. He doesn’t know what to do with his hands,” it had read.
However, it might have been another reason, too. Speaking at a fundraiser for British charity NSPCC, Caine shared: “The producer Joe Levine said, ‘I’m taking your contract away. I’ve seen you a lot on screen now and you come across as gay’. I didn’t mind, though, because a little while later, I got nominated for an Academy Award for playing Alfie – and he tried to shag every woman around.”
With his role in the balance once again, Caine confronted Baker: “’I know you’re going to fire me,’ I began, concocting some wildly improbable tale of having accidentally seen the telegram in his office, ‘and I completely understand, and I’ll go at once’. He stood there for a moment, and I realised he was actually angry. ‘I am the producer of this movie, Michael,’ he said. ‘Have I fired you?’ ‘No, Stan,’ I said. Then get on with your job – and stop reading my f***ing mail or I will fire you!”
The job would be the moment Caine became a true Hollywood actor, with Zulu propelling him into a career that would run for six decades.
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