The concert Pearl Jam thought they shouldn’t have played
Being among the biggest rock stars wasn’t exactly what Pearl Jam had in mind when first getting the ball rolling.
Eddie Vedder knew that no one like him could have possibly become one of the biggest names on MTV in the age of Guns N’ Roses, but when Nirvana blew up, Ten became the perfect middle ground between people who liked hair metal but loved the aggro sound of Seattle. This was every musician’s dream, but Vedder came dangerously close to walking away from the business altogether.
As much as the glamorous lifestyle feels fun, it’s not exactly the most enjoyable experience for those that aren’t ready for it. Having that much power at someone’s disposal might seem fun for maybe a few months, but once the crowds don’t go away, it starts to become more than a little bit awkward for people that can’t even leave their homes without getting hounded by everyone from paparazzi to crazed fans.
Pearl Jam weren’t exactly willing to play the game, either. They were punk rockers at heart, and they did everything in their power to make sure they kept their credibility intact, whether that meant suing Ticketmaster, protesting the fact that their photo was on the cover of Time magazine, and refusing to make any more music videos after ‘Jeremy’ caused a stir with concerned parents.
Vedder had his own issues to deal with, but no one else in the world circa 1993 had more weight on their shoulders than Kurt Cobain. He kicked this entire movement into high gear, and while he never wanted to be considered the voice of a generation by any means, people were always looking to Nirvana to see what the next big thing in music was supposed to be.
Even if Nirvana weren’t always cordial when talking about Pearl Jam, that didn’t make it any easier for Vedder when he heard of Cobain’s passing. There was a lot of pressure around every member of grunge’s ‘big 4’, but when any member of the Seattle scene decided to take their own life, this wasn’t only a major loss for music. It was like a death in the family for this little scene, and while Vedder did take the stage in Washington DC the night Cobain died, he almost wanted to give up on making any new music.
Despite having punk legend Ian MacKaye by their side, Vedder was incredibly confused about what the hell they were even doing playing music like this, saying, “That was actually the day that we found out about Kurt, and I was just spinning. I was lost and didn’t know if we should play, or if we should just go home, or if we should attend the services. I still have some regrets about that, even though in the end it was probably better that we played the last two weeks of the tour. I decided I would play those next two weeks and then I’d never have to play again.”
To his credit, though, Vedder handled the situation as well as anyone could in that situation. You can tell in his voice from those sessions that things were incredibly shaky, but even if Cobain was gone, there was a slight silver lining knowing that he helped bring underground music into the limelight and helped millions of kids through their own set of problems.
And since then, the rest of the band were happy to credit any of their longevity to Cobain’s memory, with Stone Gossard saying that they are half the band they are today because of him. It was never going to be easy to get over a genre bodyblow like this, and while Pearl Jam would spend a few more years licking their wounds, it was much better for them to celebrate the kind of music that Cobain helped to launch in those few weeks on tour.
