Rina Sawayama reveals she was groomed as a teenager by a teacher
Pop singer Rina Sawayama, famed also for her acting role in John Wick 4, has discussed the trauma that inspired her second album, Hold the Girl.
Speaking to the BBC for their ‘In Conversation’ feature, Sawayama explained that the album followed a recovery period amid sex and relationship therapy sessions.
“This is the first time I’m talking about this, but essentially, through doing sex therapy – sex and relationship therapy – I realised that really something that I thought was a relationship that I had when I was 17, was actually. I was groomed,” she shared. “Then why that realisation happened in my 30s was because I was finally his age.”
The song ‘Your Age’ was explicitly tied to this concept. “I remember distinctly how uncomfortable that made me, but I didn’t put the two and two together,” she continued. “And it was through this very intense form of therapy, which I feel so lucky to be able to have access to, that I was able to come to terms with that, and it completely broke my whole world apart.
“It came to light that, that was what was happening in my school, basically, it was a school teacher. I was so badly slut-shamed, that I developed so much shame around my sexuality and lost completely my sense of self, I detached from my skin like inside, I don’t know how to describe it. But I just felt so afraid of things. And I’d have anxiety attacks.”
Adding: “Seventeen to me is a child, you’re in school, you have no autonomy most of the time, and especially if you’re in a school setting, if a school teacher is coming on to you, that’s an abuse of power. I didn’t realise that until I was his age.”
Writing from a place of such pain and anguish is never easy, but can offer therapy for both the artist and the consumer. “Writing that album was one of the hardest things, but also when I finished it, it was one of the most incredible experiences. And now it makes me so happy when I see especially like women or femmes in the audience connecting to it because I haven’t talked about this in specifics. I’ve just said it’s about a period in my life when I was younger, but I know the truth and when I look out to the audience, and I see femmes or women connecting to it, I’m like maybe you know what I’m talking about, maybe you’re feeling it right now.”
Concluding the breve discussion, the singer revealed that she doesn’t want to return to the subject of trauma after Hold the Girl. As an artistic focus, it’s difficult and she hopes to get past it. “I don’t know what I’m gonna write about yet. But I would love a day where I can just write a song that’s just about love or sex, I’m getting there,” she said.
For help, advice or more information regarding sexual harassment, assault and rape in the UK, visit the Rape Crisis charity website. In the US, visit RAINN.
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