RAYE discusses drug abuse and sexual assault: “It got really dangerous at one point”
Singer, songwriter and producer RAYE has opened up about her past substance abuse. In a recent interview, the musician explained that her “dangerous” dependence on drugs was related to her experience of sexual assault.
The details of that assault are revealed in ‘Ice Cream Man’ – featured on RAYE’s new album My 21st Century Blues. In it, the musician reveals that she was sexually assaulted by an unnamed record producer and that it was just one example of a string of similar instances stretching back into childhood. “I was seven, was 21, was 17 and was 11,” she sings, “If I was ruthless they’d be in a penitentiary.”
In a new interview with the BBC, RAYE said: “When you keep things in like that, they eat away at you from the inside. And for me, sadly, substance abuse was entangled with numbing the trauma that I had experienced. I got pretty deep in, and it got really dangerous at one point.”
RAYE’s drug addiction is the subject of several songs on her new album, including ‘Escapism’ and ‘Mary Jane’. In 2017, she recalled being very wary of drugs as an adolescent. “Someone started rolling a massive joint and I was like, ‘Oh my God, drugs!’” she told the BBC. “I was just 14 and I said ‘no thanks’ but I became stoned anyway because the room became a big cloud,” she said. “I felt really scared.”
RAYE signed to Polydor Records as a teenager and spent years writing songs for the likes of Beyoncé and contributing vocals to top ten singles by David Guetta and Jax Jones. In 2021, a year after we sat down with RAYE, she revealed her label was refusing to release her debut album and that she had countless would-be hits “sat in folders collecting dust”. Others were simply given to bigger stars.
With her solo career stalling, RAYE turned to drugs and alcohol. “It was around the height of my dance-pop [hits],” she said. “I was having to go out there and be this happy pop character when, in reality, I was processing this unaddressed trauma and coping with an immense amount of pressure. Sprinkle a bit of heartbreak on there and it’s a recipe for disaster. I was just lost. It was a really sad time.”
For advice and information regarding sexual harassment, assault and rape in the UK, visit the Rape Crisis charity website. US readers should visit RAINN.
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