Nickajack Cave: the day that Johnny Cash survived death and found God
In 1967, Johnny Cash stumbled into Nickajack Cave, intent on killing himself. Dogged by a relentless addiction to amphetamines, he was cancelling shows and recordings as it ravaged his voice. Cash was in and out of hospitals as well as jail cells, alienating his loved ones and leaving him entirely hopeless. In his 1997 autobiography, Cash said that he looked and felt like a “walking vision of death”.
Unsure of where to turn, he got in his Jeep and set out on a path to suicide that resulted in spiritual transformation. Nickajack Cave, located in Marion County, Tennessee, is devoid of light and stretches for miles. It had once been a refuge for Native Americans and fugitives, and in many ways, it was perfect for Cash, an avid defender of Native rights and an outlaw in his own right. But most crucially, he knew cave explorations often killed those who got lost within them, saying: “It was my hope and intention to join that company.”
Cash walked through the cave for hours, crawling in the darkness until his flashlight wore out. As he lay waiting for death, he felt his chronic loneliness leave him. “I thought I’d left him,” said Cash, “But he hadn’t left me.” Clarity washed over him, and the years spent struggling with fame and addiction gave way to a sense of peace.
“There in Nickajack Cave, I became conscious of a very clear, simple idea: I was not in charge of my destiny,” he recalled. “I was not in charge of my own death. I was going to die at God’s time, not mine. I hadn’t prayed over my decision to seek death in the cave, but that hadn’t stopped God from intervening.” While overtaken with hope and a newfound religious fervour, it dawned on him he had no clue how to escape.
With no light to guide him, he relied on intuition and the direction of the breeze. He crawled until cracks of light started appearing, until he reached the mouth of the cave again. The sense of God-like intervention he felt was only reinforced when he saw his mother and June Carter waiting expectantly for him outside the cave.
Clutching a basket of food, they told him they knew something was wrong and were compelled to come and find him. On the drive back to Nashville, Cash told them he believed God had saved him from killing himself. He promised to commit to getting off drugs and slowly reacquainted himself with performing sober.
“I rebuilt my connection to God,” he said. “By November 11, 1967, I was able to face an audience again, performing straight for the first time in more than a decade”. His first return performance was at a high school, and he was terrified but surprised, saying: “The stage without drugs was not the frightening place I’d imagined it to be.”
