How Warren Zevon faced mortality with music
Life’ll Kill Ya, warned Warren Zevon in the title of his 2000 album. With the devasting songs ‘My Shit’s Fucked Up’ and ‘Don’t Let Us Get Sick’ in its arsenal, Zevon proved he could tackle existential dread with grace. Two years after completing that album, he was diagnosed with mesothelioma and died a year later.
Death and bodily decay were consistent themes throughout his last albums. In interviews as well as songs, he’d touched on a lifelong fear of doctors. As he did in real life, in ‘My Shit’s Fucked Up’ he confessed: “Well, I went to the doctor / I said, ‘I’m feeling kind of rough’ / Let me break it to you, son / Your shit’s fucked up.” While writing the song, he was continually ill but without a diagnosis, hence the vague allusion to a non-specific ailment.
Before taking the stage at the 2002 Edmonton Folk Festival, Zevon started to feel dizzy. After complaining of a chronic cough, his dentist urged him to see an actual doctor. His music was prophetic, and he was diagnosed with cancer, specifically mesothelioma, which attacks the lungs and chest lining. After spending years avoiding medical intervention, he was rocked by the news, heavily drinking after 17 years of sobriety.
‘Keep Me In Your Heart’ from 2003’s The Wind Zevon wrote and recorded before succumbing to his illness. Written after finding out his diagnosis was terminal, the lyrics confronted his fear of death and being forgotten: “Shadows are fallin’ and I’m runnin’ out of breath / Keep me in your heart for a while /
If I leave you it doesn’t mean I love you any less / Keep me in your heart for a while.”
It was the track he chose to record last. He had to shift from working in the studio to his house after his health continued to decline, so a makeshift studio was made for his comfort. It makes the line: “Sometimes when you’re doin’ simple things around the house / Maybe you’ll think of me and smile,” all the more gut-wrenching, knowing he was forced to contemplate his own death at home.
While heartbreaking, the way he grappled with his mortality in his music was brave, showcasing a refusal to bow to his obvious fear. He wanted to urge his fans to make the most of life while they had it and set out on a mission to promote The Wind in spite of his illness. This resulted in his famous instruction on the David Letterman Show when he told the audience to “enjoy every sandwich”.
As Letterman recalled, it was a valiant effort from Zevon. “While we’re talking, he just perfunctorily is taking his guitar, taking the strap off, doing whatever you do to a guitar,” he said. “He gets out the case, and we’re continuing to talk, and who knows what we’re saying. It was small talk. Just fill the air with something while he’s going through the business of putting the guitar in the thing. He puts it in, closes the lid, snaps it closed, hands it to me, and he says, ‘Take good care of this for me.’”
