The comedy Roger Ebert utterly despised: “So pitiful it doesn’t rise to the level of badness”
As one of cinema’s most subjective genres, it’s arguably much easier to make a terrible comedy movie than a good one. On paper, Roger Ebert was highly unlikely to be left fawning over a 2005 film that never seemed as though it would appeal to his sensibilities, and the critic responded in kind by tearing it limb from limb.
That’s not to say that Ebert didn’t have a funny bone, nor is it accurate to say he only appreciated the rib-ticklers that were unanimously celebrated as comedic masterpieces. After all, he gave a glowing review to Harold and Kumar Get the Munchies, which would never be competing for Academy Awards.
On the other hand, he was a fan of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, All About Eve, Duck Soup, Dr Strangelove, Some Like It Hot, The Producers, and countless more stone-cold genre classics, so there was definitely a sweet spot that needed to be struck between cinematic excellence and personal preference.
It would be an understatement to say that director John Mallory Asher’s Dirty Love didn’t find it, and Ebert was hardly alone in thinking so. The risible film won Razzies for ‘Worst Picture’, ‘Worst Director’, ‘Worst Screenplay’, and ‘Worst Actress’ for Jenny McCarthy, and every single one of them was richly deserved.
McCarthy’s ditzy blonde discovers her boyfriend cheating on her before her friends eventually encourage her to re-enter the dating pool. Unfortunately, she doesn’t find much luck while remaining oblivious that her close friend (played by Eddie Kaye Thomas) is hopelessly in love with her.
It sounds like a walking collection of comedy cliches, and it is. In this case, though, familiarity bred nothing but Ebert’s contempt. “Dirty Love wasn’t written and directed; it was committed,” he wrote in his review. “Here is a film so pitiful it doesn’t rise to the level of badness. It is hopelessly incompetent.”
He did at least acknowledge that McCarthy tried her best to embrace physical comedy, even if the results didn’t turn out as planned. “She doesn’t need to do this,” he urged. “It’s painful to see a pretty girl, who seems nice enough, humiliating herself on the screen. I feel sorry for her.”
Twisting the knife even deeper, Ebert admitted that the only reason his analysis reached a certain length was because it had to be. “I would like to say more, but… no, I wouldn’t,” he informed his captive readership. “I would not like to say more. I would like to say less. On the basis of Dirty Love, I am not certain that anyone involved has ever seen a movie or knows what one is.”
One positive is that even if the people who made Dirty Love were completely unaware of what a feature film was, few viewers found that out for themselves after it barely scraped past $35,000 at the box office.
