The best bad movie in cinema history, according to science
One of cinema’s most fascinating cross-sections is the murky middle ground between good movies, bad movies, and movies that are so bad they’re good, and everyone has an opinion on which films deserve to fall somewhere on the spectrum.
There are plenty of pictures considered among the greatest of all time that some viewers detest with every bone in their body, just like there are some truly wretched flicks that certain audience members will defend to the death as an unsung masterpiece. Because all art is subjective, neither camp is wrong.
However, movies that are objectively awful but become beloved because of their many shortcomings are in a class of their own. Anybody with eyes and a brain will watch them and know in their heart of hearts that they possess absolutely no redeeming features whatsoever, but somehow, it’s still love at first sight.
No filmmaker sets out to make an onscreen atrocity on purpose, and in the unfortunate even that they do, the best they can hope for is that it becomes known as one of the best of a very bad bunch. It’s different strokes for different folks as to which titles fit the bill, but thanks to science, a conclusion has been reached to name the single best bad movie that’s ever been made.
Crunching the numbers and poring through the data, Stat Significant used a number of factors to separate the woeful wheat from the craptastic chaff. Combining which of the lowest-rated films on the internet were the subjects of the most online traffic, which of Hollywood’s offenders made the most money at the box office, and which ones had the biggest discrepancies between their critical and user-generated reviews, the battle of the bad movies declared one victor: Plan 9 from Outer Space.
In terms of the shitty flicks that drummed up the most online interest, John Wayne’s The Conqueror came out on top, which might have something to do with the fact it may have killed more people than any other production in cinema history, including ‘The Duke’ himself.
For adjusted earnings based on ticket sales, Joel Schumacher’s risible Batman & Robin emerged victorious, which makes sense because it was the sequel to three hugely profitable blockbusters starring one of the planet’s most iconic and instantly recognisable fictional characters.
Of the bottom of the barrel films that were savaged by critics but adored by audiences, Tommy Wiseau’s The Room was the runaway winner, which also makes perfect sense because it’s one of the cultiest cult classics to ever cult classic, spawning an adoring fandom who continue to throw spoons during screenings three decades after its release, even though every single person in attendance knows it’s shite.
And yet, by combining all three criteria, nothing beats Ed Wood’s magnum opus. It’s fitting for the director largely regarded as the worst to ever set foot behind the camera to have the worst thing he ever directed named as the best bad movie that’s ever existed, and there’s something comforting about science confirming the long-held belief that nothing will ever be as bad as Plan 9 from Outer Space again.
